In the Eye Of the Beholder: The Sin of Gay Controversy
by Kittycatkyla
Summary: IzayaXRoppi. Part 3 Snipit of In The Eye of the Beholder. Yaoi. "Your priority should always be yourself first. If you go through life disregarding your own well-being for the sake of others, you're just a sheep." "And sheep's go to limbo." "Exactly." Izaya chuckled. "So, where do the gays go?" "Hah?" "Well, it's stated in the bible to lay with another man is the greatest sin."


"Uh! Ah! Hah, fuck!" I moaned.

Lying underneath me was Orihara Izaya. He was gritting his teeth and holding my hips tightly. I sat atop his lap, bouncing up and down his cock with all the muscles I could use in my legs and arms. I had my hands resting on his chest as leverage to my movements. My cock was weeping pre-cum on his stomach. His cock was thrusting into my ass and jabbing into my prostate with each flick of his hips.

God, it felt so fucking good.

I really wanted to cum.

"Hah, ah!" My expression softened with the pleasure. My brows furrowed up and I couldn't be bothered to stop the saliva from leaking down my chin. "Izaya, harder! Do it harder!"

Without any form of confirmation, Izaya did as I asked. He dug his nails into my flesh and slammed up hard enough to knock the wind out of me. I had to gasp to get air. My eyes went wide, and I tilted my head back.

"AH! AH! M-more! Oh, fuck! I'm gonna cum!"

I tilted my head down and closed my eyes tight shut. My whole form began shaking, every muscle tightened as my mind went completely blank with white pleasure. I trembled on top of him, spraying cum probably all over him but I didn't care to confirm. I just wanted this feeling to last.

Eventually, though, it did pass, and I was left feeling satisfied but craving more.

Izaya was still underneath me. I could feel his cock pulsing rigorously inside me. Such a sensation made me shudder.

"Did you just cum inside me?"

Izaya was quiet for a second. Then he chuckled. "Well, it's not like you gave me an option to pull out. You clamped down on me."

Oh, horseshit. He could have pulled out. He just didn't want to. I glowered down at him.

Well whatever. It felt better like that anyway. I let out a small sigh of defeat before lifting myself up. We both groaned and twitched as that cock slid out. I felt disappointed when it came out, but I wouldn't tell him that. I crawled off his lap and lied down next to him.

"I'm surprised how good at this you are." Izaya voiced. "You're obviously quite experienced."

"Why's that a shocker? What, is it possible I didn't strike you as gay?"

"Well, you stated before your dated Kuzuhara Shinju, so you obviously know the feel of a woman. Unless you never made it that far."

"Shinju and I never did, no. But I fucked plenty of girls in my day."

"And apparently plenty of men."

"What if I told you you're the first guy I've been with?"

"I would say lying is a sin."

I held back a laugh. "Shut up. You don't know."

Izaya chuckled. The raven then reached over and grabbed some tissues. He wiped my cum off of his chest and stomach. He then took some wetnaps and started cleaning his cock. I gestured for some tissues. He obliged. We both began milking our cocks to get the last dollops of cum out, less it leak out later.

"Sorry I came on ya." I said, tossing the soil tissues in the wastebin by the nightstand.

"Sorry I didn't have condoms."

"Mm-mm." I shook my head. "Can't use condoms. I'm allergic to latex."

Izaya stared at me for a moment. Then he chuckled. "Said every douchebag ever."

"Yeah, I know. I get that a lot. That's up there with the 'my cocks too big for condom so it hurts if I wear one'. But I'm being serious. I break out bad in rashes. I'm happy I found out before I started having sex, cuz that would have been miserable."

"So, when'd you find out?" He rolled over to lie on his side so he could give me his undivided attention.

"Back in middle school. We were doing dissections and my hands kept rashing out. The teacher thought it was the fumes from the formaldehyde, or the soap he passed out. Quick doctors visit showed I was allergic to latex and so I used rubber gloves for the rest of the dissection."

"Ah~, I see. You were quite lucky indeed. Eh, let's backtrack a bit though. On the note of you being gay…"

I stared at him. Then I held back a laugh. "Happy to hear you know the difference between latex and rubber. You don't know how many people tried to call me out saying the two are the same."

"They're not though."

"I know! But people are fucking dumb!"

Izaya laughed softly. "Heh, but anyway…"

"Yeah, yeah. Right. What do you want to know again?"

"How experienced you are, I guess? You seem to swing both ways, but doesn't that go against your philosophy? That's quite sinful, isn't it?"

I propped my elbow on the pillow and rested my head on my hand. "Well, firstly, I never claimed to be straight. I do swing both ways, but in recent years, I sleep with guys mostly. It's too much of a hassle to do it with girls. Honestly, I don't want anything serious, just a quick fuck, and girls get attached so easily."

"That's misogynistic, isn't it?"

"Not if it's true. Women are prone on an instinctual level to get attached to the person they sleep with. They say no strings attached, but given enough times, they'll start getting jealous and possessive—especially if the sex was good."

"They're especially prone to getting attached if the sex was good."

"See, so you already know! Calling me misogynistic, get the hell out of here!"

"But this is my bedroom."

I stuck my tongue out at him.

We both laughed softly.

"Ah, but yeah," I continued, "I just don't want to do it with girls recently."

"You know, that's not a normal thought process. Choosing to be gay instead of straight isn't as easy as you make it out to be."

"Honestly, it really is so long as you don't give a fuck about what people think about you."

"Hate crimes."

"If we were in America or Russia, I'd be worried about that, but Japan isn't really like that, now is it? We're more passive-aggressive, I would like to think. So people hear just advert eye contact or blatantly ignore your existence. Or they say small-minded things like 'ew, that's so gross', 'omg, are you really gay? They really exist?'. "

"Such ideology. You sound like an upper-class person who's never dealt with lower-class problems."

"We both know that's not true, fucker."

"Guess you're right there."

"What do you mean guess?" I glared at him. "You're really a fuckhead, you know that?"

"Ah, sorry, sorry." Izaya patted my head. "I meant no offense."

"Yeah, you did."

He smiled at me. God, he was so annoying sometimes. I let out a 'hmph' and swatted his hand.

"It's just so fun talking to you." Izaya grinned. "You're so expressive. And you say things I wouldn't expect sometimes. You have a very egocentric but open-minded attitude to a lot of things."

"Your priority should always be yourself first. If you go through life disregarding your own well-being for the sake of others, you're just a sheep."

"And sheep's go to limbo."

"Exactly."

Izaya chuckled. He rolled on his back and put his hands under his head, looking up at the ceiling.

"Where do the gays go?" Izaya asked.

I stared at him. "Hah?"

"Well, it's stated in the bible to lay with another man is the greatest sin."

"The bible was written by man, not God. The only thing God told us was the ten commandments. Everything else in the holy book is absolute horseshit."

"The bible was written by the holy spirit, people would argue."

"With what fucking hand and what fucking pen?"

Izaya's grin turned malicious.

"And besides which, the proverb, 'man shall not lay with another man' isn't in the Catholic bible, just in the other versions."

Izaya didn't respond.

"Back in college, there were two girls in my English class. One was a Catholic and she was advocating for same-sex rights in her thesis. One of her arguments was it wasn't stated in the bible that being gay was a sin. Christian girl picked a fight saying it was. So, the next day, they both brought their bibles and compared notes. Same page, same column, in the catholic chick's bible Leviticus Chapter's 18 and 20 were not there. Not as in someone defaced the book, they weren't printed on the page."

Izaya smiled at me.

"You already knew that, didn't you?"

"I just like to hear you talk."

I glowered. "You could have just said you knew that."

"But not many people know that so it's reassuring confirming you do."

"What, that the twenty different versions of the bible don't match word for word? Wow, it's almost like that was the exact point of the Great Bible, so King Henry the Fuck could divorce his wife without religious persecution. Fucking, what-the-fuck-ever man."

I glowered to the side.

"The bible was written by man, not God. And so, there's absolutely fucking nothing in those books that have to be followed except for the ten commandments."

"Well, you could argue that not even the ten commandments are written by God. Moses went up the mountain to get the commandments, but who's to say he didn't write them himself?"

"Because I know he didn't do that."

"How do you know that?"

"…Let's just say it's a bit of divine intuition…"

"Hm?" He sat up, leaning close. "Hmmmm?"

I turned my head away with a 'Hmph!'. "Not selling that information."

"Ahhh, boo~!"

I put my hands behind my head and rolled over to flump against the bed. "On the note of the bible and homosexuality, lots of people try to use Sodom and Gomorrah as an example as well. However, homosexuality wasn't the only sin of those great cities. Sodom and Gomorrah were riddled with sin. Murder, debauchery, gambling, laundering, slavery, rape, social injustices. It wasn't just gay sex. Those cities burned because there was no redeemable quality to them. They had no order; there was no God in anymore but four people's hearts. Quote, 'this was the iniquity of thy sister Sodom, pride, fullness of bread, and abundance of idleness was in her and in her daughters, neither did she strengthen the hand of the poor and needy'. Such a line is the reason the cities burned. But the only thing people remember about that story is that a mob attempted to rape the angels who came to receive Lot and his family."

"However, the fact that men tried to rape the angels is proof enough homosexuality is a sin, right?"

"No, it's not. Rape is the sin. Whether the angels were men or women is irrelevant. And on that note, in some depictions it doesn't even state if the mob was all male, and in all depictions, it was never specified in the holy book the names or the gender of the angels. But because the bible was written in a time of 'man's world' anything with a form of power was made male. And that's not necessarily a stab at the bible. It's just the truth of the time period. The Jungle Book was written in a man's world so the only role we see females play is the protective instinct of a mother wolf and the seductive allure of the village girl who coerced Mowgli to join the village. It's no less a great book, but there is definite proof that it was written in a man's world. There are plenty of books like that, and that's just how history was. I'm not trying to sound like a feminist or anything."

"You're alright. Go on." I had Izaya's complete, undivided attention.

"But yeah, so that's what happened there. For all we know, the angels that came for Lot were females and that's what attracted the attention of the mob. Or mayhaps they were such beautiful men that they were mistaken for women? We weren't there so who's to say? We only have the word of one man, who was then raped by his own daughters because all their suitors were destroyed in Sodom and Gomorrah. Like, come on. No, Sodom and Gomorrah perished because they were disgusting cities filled with the most disgusting of people. It wasn't that homosexuality was the sin, but the fact that anyone or anything with a hole was considered fair game. Bestiality, pedophilia, orgies, snuff, there's a whole laundry list of wrongful sexual acts besides gay and everyone in those cities were definitely doing them. There was no hospitality to anyone. There was no God in anyone. Just carnal sins."

"Does that mean homosexuality isn't a sin?"

"Not for the reason people claim it is. It's not like, 'you're gay so burn in hell' without question." I waved my hand dismissively in the air. "It's all about the reason behind your sexuality. As proven by science, people are born that way. There's different chemical make-up in individual's brain that make it so they can't physically be attracted to the opposite sex. Now, people can argue that those who swing both ways are obvious proof that that's not the case, however, that is also false. The most-likely case for people that swing both ways is that they were raised to enjoy one thing, but found out they enjoyed another.

"Let's put this into latent terms." I put my hands up to start pointing with my explanation. "Say, you mother really loves Oreo's. So, she raised you to only ever eat Oreo cookies. She never let you try any other cookie because Oreo's were the best and everyone only ate Oreo's! So that person will only ever eat Oreo's. Then comes a point in their life where they can start thinking for themselves, when they have just a celibacy of freedom. In that moment, they have a choice—continue eating just Oreo's because that's what Mother taught you to eat, or try to eat a new kind of cookie. Now in context to my point, Oreo is straight sex. The other cookies are all the other sexes you can have. We'll say chocolate chip cookies is gay sex. And it's not just your mother telling you to eat Oreo's. It's everyone around you, telling you and your friends and the people you don't even like to eat Oreo's because everyone likes Oreo's. But you really want a chocolate chip cookie."

I paused for a moment.

"What was the point of that explanation?"

Izaya cocked a brow. "Why people swing both ways."

"Before that."

"Gay people have a different chemical make-up in their brain."

"Before that."

"Is homosexuality a sin?"

"Right! Sorry! I got off track!"

Izaya chuckled. "Your train of thought got derailed."

"It happens a lot. I had a point but then I lost it."

Izaya snickered.

"Shut up," I chuckled as well, "Anyway, that's what happened there. So, science has proven that gay people are that way from the beginning. The reason you have people who swing both ways is because they don't know what they want, and they're finally given the chance to figure that out. Or, they're content with either party. Now, then there's the individuals who don't care which side they fuck. Let me make this clear! There's a difference between 'content with either party' and 'don't care which party'. People say it's the same thing but it's not. In the 'don't care' party, you have people who partake in debauchery, orgies, and pornography—as in porn stars, but indulging in the viewing of too much porn is bad too for a whole different reason. Anyway, those people are nothing more than lustful sinners. They're in it for the sex, not for the passion. Now the party that is 'content with either party' are more so looking for a life mate without the constrains of gender getting in the way. That's the difference between a selfish bisexual and a bisexual.

"Now…there was a point to stating that, hold on…"

Izaya chuckled.

"Right, sin! SIN! Science has proven that gays are born that way! God is not the type to condemn a child from birth! He's not that cruel! At least, I hope he's not. Anyway, if people are born that way, then that means it's not a sin. Now, lets stop to think about what comes to mind when people think of gays. They probably think dicks, sex, sodomizing. At least that's what comes to my head at first thought. Now the reason that is, is because men are known for being carnal beings of lust! They're known for being the ones who want sex, not women. So, what are two men going to do when they are attracted to each other and decide to spend time together?"

"Sex."

"Exactly! So, once again, this comes down to the concept of passion vs perversion. Are you into men because you like gay sex? Because it feels so good? Or are you into men because you hope to find a life partner within your type? Do you want to settle for a person of the opposite gender and hope you'll be happy, or find someone who makes your heart sing who just happens to be the same gender as you? To be gay is not a sin. To be a lustful pig who only wants to clap some cheeks is a sin! That's where the difference lies! That's all the 'sin of homosexuality' ever boiled down to! That's why the men in Sodom and Gomorrah were unredeemable. It's not because they found the angels attractive, but because they found the angels so attractive, they couldn't—for the life of them—keep it in their pants! They had to defile them! And that is why they burned! They had no form of control and no care for consequences! They were no different than ravenous dogs who just wanted to impregnate everything they could! No, they were no different than monkeys who just wanted to feel pleasure! That's where the sin lies! It's not in the term 'homosexual', but in the thought process of the individual!"

Izaya started clapping. "You really don't hold back when it comes to controversial philosophy, do you?"

"Well, its just so dumb, people are! I mean, its' so simple to me! I know I have an advantage because of my eyes, but the world just isn't as black and white as people think. You can't just slap a word on someone and expect that to be all that person is! Not to quote Shrek, but layers! Everyone in this world is a complex individual with layers upon layers of personality that makes them different from the next person! No two people are the same. There are about 15 boys on a baseball team so you can all slap them in the jock category and leave them there! But even if they all looked the same, dressed the same, none of them would have the same interest to the T. Ten of the boys like chocolate. Five like vanilla. Within the chocolate group, six of them like nuts, two of them like chocolate syrup, and six of them like it with nothing! That math doesn't add up? Because it fucking shouldn't! Because someone can like nuts on their ice cream but also like nothing on it! That's what it means to have layers and everyone is like that!"

"You understand something that most people don't realize until their thirties!" Izaya smiled happily. "You're a great example of human evolution! Such intelligence and thinking outsides the binds of societal morals! You may have those eyes, but those eyes don't make up your thought process. As you stated, layers. Your eyes just make it so you can understand people's greatest secrets. But this way of thinking is all you and your development of philosophy. Ah, you really were worth investing into. It's been so long since I've talked to someone who has continued to say something original without coaxing."

I held back a laugh. "Glad I can entertain you."

"Heh, you're definitely entertaining but that's not all of it. It's refreshing, without question."

I smiled. Hearing that was refreshing in it of itself.

"Hm." Izaya's smiled turned into a grin. "Two more questions."

"Shoot."

"Have you and I committed sin by doing this one-night stand?"

I looked at him. Looked at his aura in particular. Completely black.

"Nope." I said, looking up at the ceiling. "At least not for you. You just did this to release your sexual urges with no strings attached. If you betray me, it's not because of lust or spite, but simple boredom of me."

"What about yourself?"

"I can't see my own sins. Didn't I tell you that before?"

"I don't remember you mentioning it, no."

"Hm." I closed my eyes. The pillow was so soft, and sex always made me sleepy afterwards, so I was starting to feel fatigued. "I thought I did."

"So, you can't see it? Not even in mirrors?"

"Nope."

"Can you see other people's sins in mirrors?"

"Yup, among other things."

"Other things? Like what?"

I chuckled. So much for just two questions. "You know how they say mirrors are a portal to the spirit realm?"

"Yeah."

"Now, listen, normally, I can't see ghosts so don't go saying any of that shit. I'm not some kind of psychic. All I can see is sins. But sometimes, within mirrors, I can see the sins of someone who isn't there. Now either there's invisible people in the crowd, which is possible, or I'm seeing the sins of something on the other side of our plane."

"Can you see Celty-san's sins?"

"The Black Bike?"

"Yeah."

"I don't know. I haven't spoken to her face-to-face."

"Haven't you seen her on TV?"

"TV doesn't show me their sin."

He looked at me curiously. "So, mirrors show sin, but TV's don't?"

"I think because TV isn't real. And no, I don't mean actors or things like that. I mean that there's no presence in the TV. For instance, when I take a photo, I can see the persons sins through the lens but not within the photograph. Because there's no time to the photo. There's no humanity to it. It's just an object, even if it encapsulates a living person on it."

"Hm. That's interesting."

I just shrugged.

"Is it possible for sin to be transferred to another person?"

I glowered. "What, you mean like if two people sleep together, does the other party become tainted?"

"Yeah."

"…In a sense. In cases of when one party is aware their taking advantage of someone, it'll show up on that person's aura as lust mixed with betrayal. The innocent party will start developing the sin of limbo because despite how much they may have disliked it or distrusted the act, they still did nothing to stop it. Even if you're an innocent virgin who doesn't know anything about sex, there comes a point where you obviously know something is wrong. And in that moment, you have a decision to stop the act or say nothing. Those that say nothing get sins of limbo or sloth—usually limbo because it's their cowardice that kept them quiet. 'I don't want him to hate me. If I say I'm uncomfortable, I'll ruin the mood'. Things like that are cowardice. You're putting someone else before yourself. In those cases, the one who was taken advantage of will start developing sin as they try to tell themselves they were at fault, or their S.O. must have had a reason or whatever bullshit they tell themselves not to dump the piece of shit instantly."

"Ah, so it's not that they share sin, but they develop sin for the sake of another."

"Exactly. In that sense, I guess you could call it tainted. Because if it wasn't for the other party, it wouldn't have even been an incident."

"Ah~."

I groaned. "I'm take a nap now, so quit talking."

"Heh, alright. Just one final question then."

My groan turned irritated. "What?"

"Is the reason your sleeping with me instead of Tsukishima because you don't want to taint him?"

My eyes went wide as a hot, boiling rage filled my chest. Are you fucking…

I jolt upright. "And like that you fucking ruin it."

I threw the blankets off and stood.

"I'm taking a fucking shower and going home, you daft cunt."

He didn't say anything. Just chuckled. Without another word, I walked into his ensuite bathroom and slammed the door behind me.

* * *

**I might write some more snipits, or this might be the last until this story becomes a full-fledged idea. I just love the dialogue that the two have about these topics and I want to write them down before I forget them. If people want to see more snipits then I'll post some, but if not, then I won't worry about it too much.**  
**KCK**


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